I’m writing this because lately I’ve been going to IV and getting in closer proximity to the homeless. Just today a woman asked me for change and I apologized and said I didn’t have any. She told me never to apologize and don’t feel bad, if I had some money I may give it to her and that would be worth it. I found a dollar when I opened the door to my car that had fallen out of my pants when I left…. I gave it to her. On a less touching note, I have decided to change my attitude and the way I dress when I get out to DC. So to that end I packed up all the clothes I would no longer wear and took them out to IV to place them on the table for the homeless. As I was waiting for my boba tea I saw a tall guy go to the table and pick up my shirts, I smile because my clothes may be a bit short for him but they should fit better than anything he can find easily. He picks up my shirts one by one… and puts them all back. My clothes that are in perfect (nearly) shape are not good enough for the homeless. That made me sad.

Now passing from current events to those past I wanted to talk about some of the run ins I had when I was in Chicago. I was with my ex at Xmas and we had just gone to the cheesecake factory, the pad thai was ginormous and we couldn’t even come close to eating it all. A homeless guy came up asking for a dollar…

“I’m sorry I really never carry cash with me, but I can give you this.” I said holding a bag that said cheesecake factory on the side up to his chest.

“Is it something sweet?” He asked immediately.

“Uhhhh…. no. It’s pad thai and I think some chicken.” I said a little confused.

“No thank you then” and walks away.

I couldn’t believe that instead of a dollar somebody turned down almost 20$ in food from the cheesecake factory.

Another time I was by the train by Clarke and Belmont (a bit of a shifty neighborhood) its cold and pissing outside… for a change. This guy, I don’t think he was homeless but scruffy nonetheless, offers me 50$ to run across the street and pick up a paper bag for him and bring it back to this side of the street. I look at him funny and tell him no, and keep telling him no until he breaks out with:
“You stupid pussy motherf***** all you have to do is go and get the damn bag!”

“Then why don’t you do it?” I ask and walk away.

And finally… One of my favorite stories of all time. I was walking home from my summer job working at U of I at Chicago. It was sunny outside and not too hot, a rare nice day. I saw an old lady walking past me on the street, now mind you I’m of course resplendent in my gothwear… hot topic special. I smile at thelady as she walks past me. She looks straight ahead as if I had just cut loose with one of the nastiest farts of all time…. when out of the corner of her eye I see her cross herself as she walks past me. Now its one thing to not like me due to the way I dress, I’m ok with that, I can also understand being scared of me… when I’m smiling. However to feel the need to call upon your higher power to defend yourself against me when all I do is acknowledge your presence just makes me want to scream

“Not even God will save you from me!”

but I never do.

I’d love to hear some streetside run ins you all have. I think it would make for a wonderful set of short stories.